This page comprises the full verbal transcript of Sly Cooper: Thieves in Time.
- Jobs are ordered according to the jobs menu found in-game; they do not always have to be done in the order listed.
- After completing a set of jobs, a slideshow will play in which the next set of jobs are previewed. The transcripts of all slideshows can be found under the section of the last job whose completion is required to view the slideshow. Because jobs in a set can be completed in any order, the last job in a set is determined by the jobs menu.
- Lines might not be copied verbatim from subtitles, as subtitles often have errors in capitalization, punctuation or spelling. Instead, they are transcribed according to rules of standard American English. This should have no effect on the meaning of the lines.
Sly Cooper (narrating): I should probably just start at the beginning. The name's Sly, Sly Cooper, and I'm a thief... from a long line of thieves. In fact, thieving is the family business, and business was good. Although until recently, I consider myself retired. Having hung up my mask and cane, I was enjoying life on the other side of the law... in the company of a certain lovely INTERPOL agent named... Carmelita Fox. She and I had a history which generally involved her trying to lock me up. So, I should mention our current situation was only possible because she thought I had amnesia. I didn't.
Sly Cooper (narrating): It was great to finally enjoy each other's company without a Shock Pistol being involved, and we quickly put the past behind us, but as time went on, the old itch came back and I knew that I needed to pull a heist. I should also mention that as a master thief, I only steal from other thieves. So it took me a while, but I finally found what I was looking for. My target was an upstart art mogul, a real hotshot collector. He seemed respectable and even opened a new museum, but I could smell a rat. Reliable sources told me that he was dealing in black market antiques worth millions. So I felt he should share the wealth. I was working on a plan when one night, as if on cue, Bentley showed up. Bentley was the brains of our operation, the mastermind. We grew up in the same orphanage where we bonded over stealing cookies, our very first heist, and we've been best friends and partners ever since. We haven't seen each other for a while, but I knew immediately that something was up.
Sly Cooper (narrating): Bentley had been enjoying his time off too. Building a new lab from scratch with his girlfriend and fellow tech wiz, Penelope. She'd join the team on our last caper and the two of them had really hit it off. Apparently, they just finished work on a top-secret project when Penelope had simply vanished. Bentley was worried sick. He searched frantically, but found nothing. Then, he noticed something that completely stunned him. In his spare time, Bentley had been researching the Thievius Raccoonus: the master thieves handbook passed down through the Cooper family for generations, its pages overflowing with the exploits and secret techniques of my esteemed ancestors. Only now, those pages weren't so full. In fact, they were disappearing right before Bentley's eyes. Realizing there was no time to waste, he gathered his gear and raced off to Paris.
The Murray DemolitionEdit
Sly Cooper (narrating): The first thing Bentley did was track down Murray: the third in our trio. Murray was our enforcer, the muscle, and the guy who'd eaten all the cookies we stole back in our orphanage days. Through the years, the three of us had become an unbeatable team, and we were more like a family now than a gang. Murray had been living his dream on the pro driving circuit, where his van had become famous... or rather infamous for all the crashes he'd caused. Eventually, he was unable to find a sponsor due to his high insurance premiums, and he moved into demolition derby, where he remained undefeated. When Bentley showed up, however, Murray dropped everything to help out. Especially when Bentley explained that his van was the key to the whole plan.
Sly Cooper (narrating): With Carmelita distracted by a new assignment, I took the opportunity to slip away and met up with the guys at our old Paris hideout. Bentley launched into one of his elaborate presentations and I saw the whole scary picture. Someone or something was literally erasing Cooper history. Then, to our amazement, Bentley revealed that he already had the solution: time travel. It turns out his top-secret project was constructing a time machine, and now he modified the design to fit into Murray's van. We were going to travel back in time, stop those responsible, and fix the damage they'd done. Bentley explained the only catch was that in order to travel to a particular time, the machine required an object from that era. We knew from the changes to the Thievius Raccoonus that our first stop was Feudal, Japan. So here we were, about to steal a priceless 17th-century samurai dagger from the same museum I've been casing. Funny how things work out sometimes.
I Smell a RatEdit
Bentley: Okay, you both remember the plan, right?
Murray: Of course! My mind is like a steel cap!
Sly Cooper: Uh, that's "trap," Big Guy. And everybody relax! We've been over it a million times. What could possibly go wrong?
Bentley: Famous last words! Look, we're only going to get one shot at this, so we can't mess up!
Sly Cooper: All right, no messing up allowed. Now stop worrying! This is going to be a piece of cake. I'll see you both inside. Now let's get going!
(Sly gets into position and moves forward, then a chopper rises up.)
Sly Cooper: Whoa!
Bentley (binocucom): Careful, Sly! Those security choppers are bad news.
Bentley (binocucom): I suppose I don't have to mention you can jump using the X button.
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, don't forget you can double jump. Just jump then press the X button again while you're still in the air.
Sly Cooper: Right, just another one of my many talents.
Bentley (binocucom): If you find the need to adjust your perspective on things, you can move the camera around using the right stick.
Sly Cooper: Excellent. It's perfect for peeking around corners.
Bentley (binocucom): Press the circle button while jumping to interact with blue sparkling objects.
Sly Cooper: I remember. That's how I pull off some of my best moves.
(A chopper spotlight appears.)
Bentley (binocucom): Avoid those choppers, Sly. If they see you now, we're busted.
Sly Cooper: I think I can handle that.
(Sly Rail Walks on a wire when he sees Murray riding on top of a truck.)
Sly Cooper: Hey Bentley, was truck surfing part of Murray's entrance strategy?
Bentley (binocucom): Of course not, Murray's approach route is through the back alley. Why do you ask?
Sly Cooper: Uh, no reason. Anyway, it looks like he's in position now.
Bentley (binocucom): Make sure you stay on these cables, Sly. You can't risk going down to street level right now.
Sly Cooper: Not a problem, Bentley. A good thief prefers to stay above the action anyway.
Sly Cooper: Looks like a perfect night for a heist.
(Sly climbs up a pole, but it falls sideways.)
Sly Cooper: Whoa!
Bentley (binocucom): Security is getting tougher, Sly. Steer clear of the guards with lights. Avoid sprinting around the guards too. They'll hear your footsteps.
Sly Cooper: I'll be a ghost. I promise. Sure feels good to be back in business.
Bentley (binocucom): Looks like security is really beefed up tonight!
Sly Cooper: Okay, that was too close!
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, that flagpole looks like it leads right to the roof.
Sly Cooper: See, I told you it would be a piece of cake.
(Sly slides down a wire and climbs on a pipe, then the pipe splits and falls down.)
Sly Cooper: Wha?! (He hangs onto the pipe) Guess I'm a little out of practice.
Bentley (binocucom): You say something, Sly?
Sly Cooper: Uh, no. All good here, Bentley.
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, looks like you're going to have to find another way up. Use that ledge to move around to the front of the museum. And stay out of that security light!
Sly Cooper: I think I can handle that.
Sly Cooper: I can't believe the security of this place. This better be worth it.
(Sly sneaks around the ledge; here Le Paradox can be heard speaking through the window.)
(Sly climbs up to the roof and approaches the skylight.)
Sly Cooper: Easy does it.
Sly Cooper: It sure looks like someone spent a fortune on this place. I wonder what kind of surprises they have inside.
Bentley (binocucom): Careful now, that's the skylight we want, but it's locked. My instruments are showing that guard has the key.
Sly Cooper: Don't worry, Bentley. This is going to be as easy as pie.
Bentley (binocucom): Move slowly until you're right behind him.
Bentley (binocucom): When you're close enough, press the Circle button to pick his pocket. You might have to try several times until you get the key.
(Sly pickpockets the guard and gets the museum skylight key.)
Bentley (binocucom): To perform a stealth slam, sneak up behind an enemy and press the Triangle button to juggle him. Then press the Square button to finish him off.
Sly Cooper: Right, I'll make sure he never knew what hit him.
(Sly performs a stealth slam on the guard.)
Bentley (binocucom): Great Sly. Now use the key to unlock the skylight.
(Sly whistles as he unlocks the skylight, then opens it to see the dagger in the room below.)
Sly Cooper: Okay Bentley. I'm in place. Let me know when you shut down the security system.
(Bentley makes his move in the sewers.)
Bentley: Patience, Sly. You can't rush greatness, and I'm about to code a hacking masterpiece!
Bentley: Interesting, the last time I was in these sewers, I was just a teenager.
Bentley: Man, this place is disgusting!
(Bentley approaches a wall blocking his path.)
Bentley: My bombs should make sure working meant great. I just need to press the Triangle button to place one.
(After blowing the obstacle.)
Bentley: Well that was a blast, he-heh!
Bentley: Who says turtles are slow?
(Approaches a large gap.)
Bentley: That's a big jump. I better use the Hover Pack here. If I jump and press and hold the X button while I'm in the air, my jets will let me glide a long way.
Bentley: Thank you, technology!
(Upon reaching another obstacle.)
Bentley: Great, that platform is blocked! I'll have a throw a bomb to clear it off. If press and hold the L1 button, I can bring up my range finder, then I can adjust the range of my throw by pressing forward or backward on the left stick. Once I find the right distance, I just press the Triangle button to toss a bomb with pinpoint accuracy.
(After blowing the obstacle.)
Bentley: That's a direct hit!
(While hovering over the gaps.)
Bentley: Agh! If I fall in that filthy water, I'm buying a new shell!
(As he presses on.)
Bentley: Why didn't I wear my rubber gloves?
(Bentley reaches the entrance to the control room.)
Bentley: Hmm, according to the schematics, the control room is right underneath me. All I have to do is find a way in. Some explosives should do the trick.
(Blows the hole open, leading to the area below.)
Bentley: And voila! Instant shortcut!
(Bentley jumps down through the hole.)
Bentley: Aah! (leaps forward over the lasers) Agh! Phew! Talk about your close shaves!
Sly Cooper: How's that security system going, Bentley?
Bentley: Uh... great! Perfect! I'll be done in a jiffy!
Sly Cooper: Uh-huh...
Bentley: Next time, I'm giving Sly the sewer job.
(Upon reaching the security system.)
Bentley: Now for a patented Bentley hack attack.
(When the hacking begins.)
Bentley: Hello, old friend. We need to reach the main docking gate before the security codes flushes us from the system. The left stick should navigate the ship.
(Reaching the second section.)
Bentley: The right stick should control the big cannon! The big cannon can blast right through that firewall! The big cannon performing well, moving while firing is key to cracking this system. This oughta do the trick.
(Reaching the third section.)
Bentley: Dang it! This reinforced firewall is too strong for the big cannon. If I use that upgrade slot, I can engage my Panzer Code.
(Upon switching to Panzer Code.)
Bentley: Oh yeah, time to bring out the big guns, baby! These gigabomb shells will crush those firewalls!
Bentley: Security drones! I can either dodge them or blast them!
(After completing the hack.)
Bentley: And that's the way the codebase crumbles!
Bentley: Okay Murray, you're on!
Murray: "The Murray" is ALWAYS on, Bentley!
Bentley (binocucom): Okay Murray, we need to get you back into fighting shape. Why don't you warm up with a few basic attacks. Press the Square button to punch.
Murray: Oh yeah! The old muscle memory is really kicking in!
Bentley (binocucom): Press and hold the Triangle button to charge up, and release it for a wicked spinning attack!
Murray: Yes! Nobody can withstand the pink tornado!
Bentley (binocucom): To perform Thunder Flop, jump and press the Triangle button while in the air.
Murray: Oh, Thunder Flop, how I've missed you!
(While fending off the guards.)
- Is that the best you got?!
- You chumps are no challenge!
- Who wants a piece of "The Murray"!
- I almost feel sorry for you guys.
- You guys should've taken the night off.
- I'm getting bored here!
- My knuckles are just getting warmed up!
- You clowns don't know when to quit!
- You punks better call for backup!
Bentley (binocucom): Alright, make your way to the loading dock. You gotta take out all the guards before I can open the gate.
(Murray enters the loading dock and spots a rat trooper.)
Murray: Huh? Where did you come from, shortstuff?
(Other guards show up and pounce on him, making him fall to the floor.)
- You little guys, you're just not tough enough!
- I'm getting bored here.
(Murray shakes the guards off.)
Murray: Aaaaaaahhhhhhh! That felt great!
Bentley: Uh... Everything okay, Murray?
Murray: Now it is!
Bentley (binocucom): Murray, don't forget to use your throwing ability. Press the Circle button to stomp near an object and you will pick it up. Then press the Square button to throw the object. If you press the Triangle button instead, you can slam the object down.
(After Murray sabotages the junction boxes.)
Bentley: (binocucom) Okay Sly, the security system is down. You're all clear!
Sly Cooper: Great! I'm going in.
(Sly steals the dagger and is confronted by Inspector Fox.)
Sly Cooper: What the--
Carmelita Fox: You didn't really think you were going to get away with it, did you, Ringtail?
Sly Cooper: Hey Carmelita, funny meeting you here.
Carmelita Fox: Sly Cooper, you no-good, lying thief! I'm locking you up for good!
Sly Cooper: Sorry! Gotta take a raincheck! I'll call you!
Carmelita Fox: Cooper!
Sly Cooper: Good evening, this is Sly Cooper. I'd like to request a ride.
Bentley (binocucom): Cute, Sly. Now quit messing around and get down here! We're in the van and ready to roll!
Sly Cooper: Au revoir!
(Sly jumps down onto the van.)
Sly Cooper: Let's hit it!
Murray: Buckle up, boys!
Murray: Oh yeah, just like in the Demolition Derby!
Bentley: Look out! Ooh! I think I cracked my shell. Watch out for those trees!
Bentley: Where are you going?
Murray: Just setting up for the jump! Welcome to Air Murray! Thanks for flying!
(Sly gets into the passenger's seat.)
Sly Cooper: Nice landing, Murray. Hey Bentley, not to complain, but we're kind of trapped here.
Bentley: Relax, Sly, just put the dagger in the receptacle.
Bentley: Perfect. Isotopic decay calibrated... adjusting fusion synthesis... Anytime you like to punch it, Murray.
Murray: You got it, chum!
Bentley: Do NOT slow down, Murray!
Murray: I never do!
Sly and Murray: Whoa!
(The van roars off, disappearing through time.)
Sly Cooper (narrating): Well, what else can I say about Carmelita? As you can see, our relationship is... complicated, and I just succeeded in upgrading it to hazardous. I certainly wasn't expecting her to crash the party. She'd been so busy with her latest case, I'd never thought she had her eye on me. In fact, I'd kinda been counting on it, but then, I should've known better than to underestimate Inspector Carmelita Fox. As much as she'd like having fun, Carmelita was serious about her police work... and now, I had a lot of explaining to do, but the plan was in motion, and there was no stopping now, even though I was thinking I'd need the time machine to patch things up with Carmelita.
Sly Cooper (narrating): Before the heist, we'd recruited our disco-loving, scuba diving friend, Dimitri Lousteau, to look after the Thievius Raccoonus. Because it was irreplaceable and the only guide we had, it was far too risky to take the book through time with us. Bentley had even invented a communication device to allow us to contact Dimitri no matter where or when we travel. It was a perfect situation since it allowed him to update us on any changes to the book while eliminating our exposure to his ... fashion critiques. Everything was happening so fast. The past few days were just a blur, but as we howled through the time vortex, I realized we were in for a very long trip.
Episode 1: Turning JapaneseEdit
Sly Cooper (narrating): We needed to locate Rioichi Cooper - master ninja and master chef. According to the Cooper Clan history, Rioichi Cooper was actually the inventor of sushi. After creating this delectable dish, he opened a sushi restaurant, which while very prosperous, also provided a perfect cover for a ninja. When we got to Japan, it was obvious something was very wrong. What should've been a peaceful village, was more like a heavily patrolled military base. We located Rioichi's sushi restaurant, only to find it shut down and under guard. Things got worse when Bentley discovered that Rioichi was locked up in a new high security jail, allegedly for serving bad sushi to the shogun. It all sounded like a pretty tough piece of fish to swallow. We needed to get to the bottom of the situation, and the first order of business, was getting Rioichi out of prison.
Bentley (binocucom): Okay Sly, we need to break Rioichi out of jail. I have some ideas, but you know the drill - I need you to do some recon for me.
Sly Cooper: Camera work?
Bentley (binocucom): Correct-a-mundo, mon ami. I need shots of the Prison entrance and the Samurai Armor those big guards are wearing. You should also grab some shots of Rioichi's restaurant. We may need those for later. Capisce?
Sly Cooper: Uh, yeah. I got you, pal, but maybe we should just stick to English?
Bentley (binocucom): Sayonara, Cooper-san!
Sly Cooper: I can't believe we made it out of Paris in one piece.
(Sly takes a picture of a Boar Guard's armor.)
Bentley (binocucom): These guards look like real bruisers.
Sly Cooper: And real ugly too. That was definitely not his best side.
(Sly then takes a picture of the Imperial Prison.)
Bentley (binocucom): Hmm. I really don't like the look of that place.
Sly Cooper: Heh. Something tells me the inside looks even worse. How will I explain this to Carmelita? Time travel? She'll never believe it.
(Sly takes a picture of the Dragon Gates.)
Bentley (binocucom): That might be the largest gate I've ever seen.
Sly Cooper: The thief in me just needs to know what's behind it. I think the next time I see Carmelita, I better duck first and ask questions later.
(Sly takes a picture of the Sushi House.)
Bentley (binocucom): Mm. I love sushi! Sly, there's some kind of commotion outside the local Geisha house. Go check it out and grab some shots too.
Sly Cooper: Bentley, remind me to buy you your own camera.
(Sly approaches the Geisha house and takes a picture of it. Just then, a tiger named El Jefe comes out.)
Sly Cooper: This guy definitely looks out of place. I better get a shot of this guy's ugly mug for Bentley.
Sly Cooper: He should be crawling around a tropical jungle somewhere.
Sly Cooper: I'm pretty sure they didn't smoke Cuban cigars in the (?)
(Sly takes a picture of El Jefe.)
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, I'm sure I recognize that guy! He's wanted by INTERPOL! He's a ruthless mercenary general, responsible for overthrowing several small countries!
Sly Cooper: So what kind of mess are we in, Bentley?
Bentley (binocucom): I don't know, but one thing's for certain - my hunch was correct: We aren't the only ones with a time machine!
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, this place is locked down tighter than... well, tighter than something.
Sly Cooper: Your database security? Murray's pants?
Bentley (binocucom): Whatever Sly, this is no laughing matter. I've checked and there really is no way in except for the front entrance. I think there's only one option.
Sly Cooper: The doorbell?
Bentley (binocucom): Very funny. No. You're going to need a disguise. Get yourself a suit of armor from those guards. That's our way in.
Sly Cooper: Roger that. Just call me "Samurai Sly."
(Sly pickpockets a guard and gets the Samurai helmet.)
Bentley (binocucom): Good job, Sly! You got the helmet!
(Sly pickpockets another guard and gets the chest plate.)
Bentley (binocucom): That's the chest plate, now you just need the leggings.
(Sly pickpockets the last Samurai Armor piece from a guard, allowing him to don the Samurai Armor.)
Bentley (binocucom): Excellent, Sly! You got the complete suit of armor!
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, you need the Samurai Armor to blend in with the guards. As long as you're wearing it, they'll think you're one of them. Press the L2 button to change into the armor. Press the L2 button again to take it off... and don't forget, you won't be able to use your normal moves while in disguise.
Sly Cooper: Thanks, Bentley, time to try this out on the guard at the prison door.
(Sly approaches the guard at the prison door wearing the Samurai Armor.)
Sly Cooper: You there! Open the door!
Boar Guard: Hmmph! A little short to be a commander, aren't you? Who are you?
Sly Cooper: Why, I am.... Major Muggshot!
Boar Guard: Hmmph! Muggshot?! I've never heard of you!
Sly Cooper: You dare question me?! Son, I've been a guard since you were just a squealing piglet!! Wait until I tell the general about this! I hear he LOVES porkchops...
Boar Guard: Wait! I'm very sorry, sir! I didn't recognize you! Please go right in!
(Sly enters the Imperial Prison.)
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, you might want to put on that armor before the guards spot you.
Sly Cooper: That Samurai Armor should do the trick here.
Sly Cooper: Rioichi invented the Ninja Spire Jump! He's awesome!
(Sly walks through the prison in the Samurai Armor until he reaches Rioichi's cage.)
Sly Cooper: (whispering) Hey! Rioichi Cooper! Are you okay?
Rioichi Cooper: You guards all seem to make very poor jokes!
Sly Cooper: C'mon! I'm not one of those bozos! (removes Samurai armor) I'm here to bust you out! The name's Sly....
Rioichi Cooper: Ah, I see. A fellow ninja! Very good! You will need to make your way to the Dragon Bridge to reach this cage. Hurry up!
Sly Cooper: Okay, I'll be there soon, just... stay put!
Rioichi Cooper: Heh heh heh. Very funny.
(Using the Samurai Armor, Sly makes his way through the prison.)
Sly Cooper: I can't believe they caught Rioichi. They must've gotten lucky.
(Sly reaches a section with flamethrowers.)
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, that Samurai Armor is highly unique. I've done some tests, and I'm positive that it's fire resistant. While wearing it, you should be able to walk directly through flames.
(Approaches some swinging axes.)
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, that armor is pretty tough, but I'm very certain it won't stop a giant ax.
(Sly makes it away from the hazards.)
Bentley (binocucom): Phew! That was a hot situation!
(Sly continues to sneak through the prison.)
Sly Cooper: I must've read about him in the Thievius Raccoonus a million times!
Sly Cooper: I gotta hurry. No way I can let this guy down.
(Upon reaching the Dragon Gate.)
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, I don't think you can break the lock on that gate, and even if you could, there's no time.
Sly Cooper: Thanks, Bentley. How about some good news?
Bentley (binocucom): Look around, Sly. One of these guards must have the key.
Sly Cooper: See? That's more like it.
(Sly steals the key and unlocks the gate, then accidentally steps on a switch, causing the gate to close and the bridge to fall apart.)
Sly Cooper: Eh, oops...
(As he proceeds across the gap.)
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, it appears that shield is composed of the same material as your armor. In fact, you should be able to use it to deflect flame attacks. Press and hold the Square button to charge up, then release the button to swing the shield. Time the swings to hit incoming projectiles.
(As Sly approaches the flaming dragon statues.)
Rioichi Cooper: Watch out for those dragons!
(After destroying two dragon statues.)
Rioichi Cooper: Excellent! Your technique is very good!
(As Sly draws closer to Rioichi's cage.)
Sly Cooper: Hold on, Rioichi. You won't be a prisoner much longer.
(Upon reaching Rioichi's cage.)
Rioichi Cooper: Hmmm, I do not know you, but only a true Cooper could have reached this cage...
Sly Cooper: Ya! I didn't want to alarm you, but my full name is Sly Cooper. I'm your relative... from the future...
Rioichi Cooper: Do not worry, ninja are never alarmed. With all that has happened here lately, I believe you.
(The cage begins to break loose.)
Sly Cooper: Uh, whuh, whoa!
Rioichi Cooper: Now perhaps you would open the cage so that we may escape certain death?
Sly Cooper: Right! Of course!
(Sly breaks Rioichi free, then the two proceed to climb up the chain holding the cage.)
Sly Cooper (narrating): After rescuing Rioichi, we returned to the hideout. Unfortunately, there wasn't much time for "family reunions." We needed to figure out what was going on and fast. Rioichi confirmed that the source of the trouble was the tiger we tracked in the village, someone calling himself El Jefe. After some more database digging, Bentley was able to uncover his INTERPOL file. El Jefe had an impressive record. Over the years, he had taken over dozens of small countries around the globe. Usually, for the highest bidder. He was a ruthless mercenary and military strategist of the highest order. In fact, he once boasted that he could overthrow a country commanding only three blind mice armed with plastic spoons. According to his file, this guy had mysteriously vanished a while back just as the authorities were closing in. Well, we had found him and we needed to take him down. It looked like we were in for a tough battle. So, we decided to start with Rioichi's Sushi Shop.
Sushi House StartupEdit
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, Sly, it's time for Rioichi to reclaim his sushi restaurant. It looks like the front door is the only entrance. We need to get rid of that guard if we're going to get Rioichi inside. However, security is on high alert since we broke him out of jail and we can't risk raising an alarm. I think this one is going to require some... misdirection.
Sly Cooper: What do you mean?
Bentley (binocucom): I bet if you wore that Samurai armor you stole, you'd be able to "relieve" that guard at the front door.
Sly Cooper: Right... plus I just look good in armor.
Bentley (binocucom): Puh-lease...
(El Jefe approaches the guard at the sushi restaurant.)
El Jefe: No one gets in or out, understand?! I don't want any more problems!
(Sly approaches the guard wearing the Samurai armor.)
Sly Cooper: Dismissed!
(The guard leaves and Sly then uses his shield to give Rioichi a boost to the window. Rioichi then goes inside the restaurant. Once inside, he reaches under the mat to retrieve his cane.)
Bentley (binocucom): Okay Rioichi, I guess I don't need to tell you about your own place. Quite ingenious of you to use your sushi knives as door keys, by the way.
Rioichi Cooper: Bentley-san, I AM a ninja master.
Bentley (binocucom): Right, uh... my bad. Anyway, my scan reveals your sushi knives are still here. The bad news is the guards definitely have them. There are also some security traps you've DEFINITELY never seen before.
Rioichi Cooper: Bentley-san, though the bamboo forest is dense, water flows through it without effort.
Bentley (binocucom): Umm, yeah. Just be careful not to alert the guards. Now get those knives and take your restaurant back!
Rioichi Cooper: (to himself): Hmm, I was unable to practice my technique while locked in that cage. Let me recall that Leaping Dragon technique.
(After climbing up the plant stem and spire jumping to the light.)
Rioichi Cooper: First, I need to press and hold the R2 button to gather my focus, while using the left stick to direct my energy towards a target.
(Upon reaching a room where the first knife is located.)
Bentley (binocucom): Rioichi, my scan indicates on of the nearby guards has your knife.
Rioichi Cooper: First, I will reclaim my knives, then I will show El Jefe this shop cannot be closed.
(Rioichi reclaims his carving knife.)
Rioichi Cooper: One can only cut sushi properly with a knife this sharp.
(He unlocks the door and comes across a green laser grid.)
Rioichi Cooper: Hmm, I wonder if any of these traps would provide a challenge.
(As he approaches the next room.)
Rioichi Cooper: Sly and his friends are strong and nice. I am truly in their debt.
(Rioichi sneaks behind the next guard and reclaims his fillet knife.)
Rioichi Cooper: This is my finest knife. My sashimi will be perfect!
(Rioichi unlocks the next door.)
Bentley (binocucom): All right Rioichi, only one more knife to go.
(Once Rioichi approaches the next room, which has three guards.)
Rioichi Cooper: I really must clear this vermin from my restaurant.
(Rioichi presses on until he finds the last guard, which he reclaims his cleaver from.)
Bentley (binocucom): Okay! Now turn on your restaurant sign and send El Jefe a message.
Rioichi Cooper: One day, I will bring greatness to this shop again.
(Rioichi flips the switch, restoring power to the restaurant and spooking the guards.)
(Bentley and Murray appear at the entrance to Sashimi Caverns.)
Murray: It's been a long time since we went fishing, Bentley. I'm excited!
Bentley: Well, this is no vacation, Murray. We need to help Rioichi get back on track as a sushi chef, and what he needs most right now is fish! We're here because these caves are his secret spot for catching the best fish. Unfortunately, judging from this security lock, it looks like El Jefe's been here too.
Murray: Can you open it, Buddy?
Bentley: Are you kidding? I've never met a system I couldn't hack. Don't worry, Murray, we'll be fishing in no time.
(Bentley begins the Alter Ego hacking minigame.)
Bentley: All right, navigation is smooth and steady. The right stick should fire my binary packets. Check!
(Bentley approaches the first set of ion bits.)
Bentley: Hmm, I can absorb those ion bits to level up! Of course, while combining multiple ionic particles, I can supercharge my attack!
Bentley: But taking damage will drop my valence level.
(When encounter the first logic bomb.)
Bentley: Yes, a logic bomb! I need to grab that. Configuring the R1 button to detonate logic bombs.
(When approaching the first group of nano-bots.)
Bentley: Jeez, these nano-bots are swarming! I better blast them or stay out of their way.
(When approaching the first two nano-cannons.)
Bentley: Those nano-cannons are no joke! Too many hits and I'll crash!
(When nearing the end, approaching the CPU boss.)
Bentley: Yikes, that CPU is overclocked! I need to take it out before it reboots.
(After hack is complete, Bentley and Murray head inside the caverns, carrying a cart.)
Bentley: Okay, Murray! We need to find the secret fishing hole. Let's try that gate over there! Think you can open it?
Murray: No problem, chum. Fresh fish coming up!
(Murray lifts the gate up, and the two proceed on through, encountering Mammoth Lightning Bugs.)
Bentley: Hold up, Murray! Those Mammoth Lightning Bugs will give you a nasty shock! Lucky for us, that large plant is a 'Giant Lamp Leaf.' Hitting it will make it glow and attract the bugs! Give it a whack and get those things out of our way!
Murray: Awesome! You know how much I like to hit stuff!
(Murray hits the plant and the two press on through another gate, and come across some lily pads.)
Bentley: Be careful jumping on those lily pads, Murray. This is one situation where your muscle mass may be problematic.
(The two proceed on until they reach the fishing hole.)
Bentley: Let's hurry! The fish should be biding right now!
(The two reach the spot, and Bentley begins fishing.)
Bentley: Let's see, without a real fishing pole, I'm going to have to use this old magnet from Murray's toy robot. I calibrated its output to coincide with the fishes' bio-electric fields. So if I can keep it close enough, it should attract them like a charm. Talk about animal magnetism! I just need to tilt like this to move it around.
(As Bentley tries to attract the fish.)
- I see you hiding there.
- Here, fishy fishy.
- Don't worry, I analyzed their swimming patterns.
- That's right. Come to papa.
(If Bentley fails to catch a fish.)
- Oooh, almost.
(As Bentley catches the fish.)
- Sweet jujubes! It's a rare, giant waldo lansky!
- Yep! A delectable spotted snakemouth!
- Yes! A perfect speckled cave nipper!
- Yes! A superb striped rock sucker!
- Yes! Scrumptious long-nosed snorkeler!
- Yeah! Fat big-eyed bug eater!
- Yep, a beautiful, large mouthed horseface.
- Wow! This one's huge!
- Nice catch, pal!
(If time expires.)
Bentley: Rats! Looks like I'll have to try again with the next school of fish.
(After all the fish are gathered.)
Bentley: Okay, Murray, take that fish to the cart.
Bentley: Murray, you won't be able to activate that plant while holding the fish. Try throwing them into that old cart. You can pick them up again after you get rid of those lightning bugs.
(If Murray destroys the bucket of fish.)
Murray: Shoot! I need some more fish.
(Bentley and Murray make it back to the entrance. Murray carries the cart of fish out.)
Murray: Man, this is a serious load! Ohhhh, do you think Rioichi will make us some sushi as a reward?
Bentley: I'm not sure, but let's just get this fish back to him without El Jefe's goons turning us into sashimi!
Murray: Never fear, Bentley! Nobody makes a Hippo Roll out of The Murray!
Pretty in PinkerEdit
Bentley (binocucom): Okay Rioichi, the plan's simple: El Jefe only comes out of the castle to talk to Madame Geisha. If we want to know what he tells her, we're going to need her costume. The good news is I discovered she's on vacation, and El Jefe doesn't know it yet. The bad news is it looks like the Geisha House is locked up tight. There's no way to get in from the street. If only you could get to the roof...
Rioichi Cooper: Ah, for a ninja, there is always a way...
Bentley (binocucom): Okay...
Rioichi Cooper: Talk to you inside, Bentley-san.
(Rioichi enters the Geisha House through a hatch on the roof.)
Bentley (binocucom): Rioichi, it appears that Madame Geisha's outfit is locked inside that large container. Although, you'll probably want to stay off the floor in here. No sense in alerting the guards.
Rioichi Cooper: Of course. Does a cat alert the rats?
Bentley (binocucom): Uh, right. Okay, we can get in from the top, but judging from the lock mechanism, it appears to be opened remotely. I'm going to need you to locate and activate the control devices. It looks like the doorway to the first wing is open. There's bound to be one in there. And a whole load of traps. So be careful.
Rioichi Cooper: Arigato, Bentley-san.
Rioichi Cooper: I do not see how Murray-san will fit into that outfit.
Rioichi Cooper: Perhaps he is very flexible.
(Rioichi enters the first wing.)
Rioichi Cooper: These traps are almost too easy for a ninja.
(Rioichi ventures through the Geisha House until he reaches the room with the control device.)
Bentley (binocucom): The device is just across the room.
(Rioichi approaches the device.)
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, Rioichi. Log me into that terminal and I'll take care of business.
(Rioichi connects Bentley to the device.)
Rioichi Cooper: What do logs have to do with it?
(Bentley begins a Spark Runner hacking mini-game.)
Bentley: Okay, time to try out my new code cracker. I need to guide the spark to the circuit before that timer runs out. Good thing I programmed the guidance system to use my motion sensor. I just need to tilt in the direction I want the spark to travel.
(When approaching parallel wires.)
Bentley: Okay, if I press the right button, the spark should jump the gap to the next wire.
(When approaching the section with an open ledge.)
Bentley: Yeesh! If I roll off the grid, it's game over!
(Nearing the end of the hack.)
Bentley: There's the central port! Got to get there before the system shuts down!
(Bentley completes the hack, and the top of the large container holding the Geisha costume opens. Rioichi then returns to the main room.)
Rioichi Cooper: Now to unlock that Geisha outfit for Murray-san.
(Rioichi climbs to the top of the container, then Murray appears, preparing to drop down inside it.)
Murray: Target acquired. Agent Hawk going in...
Rioichi Cooper: Uh, Murray-san, please be careful! That cable looks rather delicate...
Murray: Have no fear, The Murray is here!!
(The cable snaps, and Murray falls down into the containers.
(The container falls apart, alerting the guards.)
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, Murray. It looks like we're going to have to try out your disguise a bit earlier than expected. I hope you remember the routine we rehearsed!
(A boar guard turns around and spots Murray.)
Boar Guard: You there! What's going on? Explain yourself!!
(Murray slowly turns around, wearing the Geisha outfit and stunning the guards.)
Murray: Konnichi wa. I am the most famous Madame Geisha. Please allow me to entertain you.
(He then puts on a dance performance for the guards for the remainder of the job.)
Bentley: Okay, according to my calculations, this is the optimal location to launch the RC car. With the miniature microphone I installed, it should be a snap to follow El Jefe and see what he's up to...
(Bentley sees El Jefe walking down the bridge.)
Bentley: Looks like he's headed for prison. Time to get rolling...
(Bentley launches the RC car.)
Bentley: Time to track that tiger.
Bentley: (microphone) Murray's old chicken hat is going to come in handy too. I just need to remember to press the L2 button to enable the perfect poultry camouflage.
Bentley: (microphone) The chicken disguise worked like magic!
Bentley: Penelope was always the RC queen. Oh Penelope, where are you? I just need to stay focused.
(The RC car follows El Jefe to the prison.)
El Jefe: Ah, even this magnificent prison pales when compared to my new statue fortress!
Bentley: (microphone) New statue fortress? That must be where he's hiding out all the time...
El Jefe: (laughs) Nobody would guess the Palace Gate switch is actually under the bridge!
Bentley: (microphone) Heh heh. You're messing with the wrong turtle, buddy!
(The RC car follows El Jefe to the entrance of Sashimi Caverns.)
El Jefe: Bah! Fishing caves. Good thing I sealed them! My Dragon Gates are invincible as long as that lazy guard doesn't get distracted by sushi!
(The RC car rides forward, as El Jefe continues walking.)
Bentley: (microphone) Verrrry interesting! I think we can probably help that guard out. Heh heh...
El Jefe: Even if those fools get to the Dragon Gates, they'll never figure out the switches are inside the dragon mouths! Hahaha
Bentley (microphone): Heh heh. Excellent! Keep flapping those big lips, sucker!
(Bentley continues following El Jefe with the RC car.)
Bentley (microphone): Eeny, Meeny, Miney, Moe. Which way did that tiger go?
(The RC car follows El Jefe towards the Geisha House. El Jefe then drops down from the roof and turns around to see the car in the chicken disguise.)
El Jefe: Now I just need to find that blasted Rioichi, so I can deliver the package to the boss!
(El Jefe heads towards the Geisha House.)
Bentley (microphone): Package? Boss? We need to figure out what's going on in that Palace...
(Murray approaches El Jefe in his Geisha costume.)
Murray: Konnichi wa, Jefe-san.
El Jefe: Greetings, Madame Geisha!
(El Jefe leans down to kiss Murray's hand, allowing Murray to swipe the map from his back and toss it to Bentley. Murray and El Jefe then enter the Geisha House, followed by El Jefe slapping him on the butt.)
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, Rioichi, we need to collect samples from those strange plants growing high on the cave walls. Commonly known as the Spiky Wall Climber, it secretes a mild toxin we can use to make sushi rolls that will put any guard to sleep instantly. Just be careful not to be overcome yourself...
Rioichi Cooper: Bentley-san, did I not explain-
Bentley (binocucom): You're a Ninja Master. I know, I know.
Rioichi Cooper: Hai! Now, allow me to show you how it's done.
Bentley (binocucom): Well, now at least I know where Sly gets it from...
(Upon reaching the first plant.)
Rioichi Cooper: I must strike the blossom to extract the poison.
(After taking the poisonous seed.)
Rioichi Cooper: This compound will topple even the largest enemy.
Rioichi Cooper: Ah, this poison will make those guards sleep like babies.
Rioichi Cooper: Only Bentley believes these puny traps can stop a ninja?
(Upon reaching the second plant.)
Rioichi Cooper: I must strike the blossom to extract the poison.
- Bentley Chalk-Talk
Bentley: Alright, we have all the intel we need. El Jefe has played dictator for the last time, and it's time to bring him down. First, we need to open those dragon gates. Thanks to Rioichi's special sushi rolls, the guards are out for the count. Sly, you'll need to gain access to the switches in their mouths. Next, we'll need to open the palace sword gate. However, the bridge is crawling with guards, so we'll need to create a diversion. Murray, you, Sly and myself will need to distract the guards. Once they're occupied, Rioichi can make his way under the bridge to the switch and open the gate. Once we get that gate open, there's nothing stopping us from taking the palace and putting El Jefe in his place. Viva la revolución!
(After Sly steals the key.)
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, Sly, use those rollers to open the dragon mouths. You'll find the switches somewhere inside, and don't forget your armor. Something tells me those things have very bad breath.
(Sly unlocks the rollers and uses the Samurai Armor to destroy both dragons which unlocks the Dragon Gates. The gang enters the fortress. Once they make their way to El Jefe's fortress, they see a blimp rising up.)
Sly Cooper: Whoa...
(The Cooper Gang heads over to the bridge where El Jefe is waiting for them.)
El Jefe: (laughs) End of the line, Cooper! (smokes his cigar) Get them you fools!
The gate closes as a bunch of rat troopers appear to fight
Bentley: Okay, you all know what to do.... Time to kick some butt!
Murray: My favorite time of the day!
(Rioichi rushes over to the side of the bridge as he salutes the gang and goes under. Sly smiles at this.)
Sly Cooper: Let's do this!
(Sly and the gang fight the guards, while Rioichi makes his way to the rollers underneath the bridge to open the door. They proceed through the door, then El Jefe pounces on Rioichi.)
El Jefe: Ha! It's mine!
(El Jefe takes Rioichi's cane and throws him back.)
Rioichi Cooper: My cane!!
(El Jefe then pulls out his knives and destroys the bridge.)
El Jefe: Sorry, Cooper... you lose! I need to deliver this puny stick to a new owner!
(El Jefe heads towards his statue.)
Bentley: No! El Jefe's getting away!
Sly Cooper: Don't worry, Rioichi. Watch out for these two. I'm going to kick some tiger tail and get your cane back!
(Sly makes his way forward to find El Jefe sitting on his chair stroking a bird.)
El Jefe: Hahaha! Hey, Cooper, what do you think of my statue?
Sly Cooper: It looks like a real pigeon magnet.
(El Jefe whacks the bird.)
El Jefe: Bah! I hope you can fly like a pigeon, Cooper. Otherwise, you'll never catch me!
(El Jefe leaps onto a rope and cuts it, allowing him to rise upwards towards his fortress.)
Sly Cooper: We'll see about that!
(Sly heads after him and climbs high up where he spots the giant statue.)
El Jefe: A magnificent likeness isn't it, Cooper? Almost as handsome as the real thing!
Sly Cooper: Huh. Yeah, it looks almost big enough to contain your over-inflated ego.
El Jefe: Take a nice, long look. I want you to remember the one who crushed you!
Sly Cooper: Looks to me you've got nowhere left to run, El Jefe. Ready to face me now?
El Jefe: Hahaha! Sticking up for the family, eh Cooper? Too bad you'll never see any of them again!
El Jefe: Hahahaha! Oh Cooper, you've climbed so high, and now...
(El Jefe leaps onto the side of his statue and slides down the rope.)
El Jefe: ...You're gonna fall!
(El Jefe jumps down onto a platform, prepared to fight Sly.)
(Sly hops across some pillars to reach El Jefe.)
Sly Cooper: Gotta dodge these fireballs and get close.
El Jefe: Welcome to your doom, Cooper!
(As Sly gets closer.)
El Jefe: Bring it on, Cooper!
(Sly makes it to El Jefe's position. El Jefe retreats to another location.)
El Jefe: Feeling the heat yet?!
(Sly approaches El Jefe again.)
El Jefe: You know something, Cooper? You're actually starting to annoy me.
Sly Cooper: Oh, don't worry. I have that effect on all cowardly crime lords.
El Jefe: Grrrrrrrr!
Sly Cooper: El Jefe. Isn't that Spanish for "big baby?"
El Jefe: Bah! Enough of these stupid games!
(El Jefe pulls out his swords and prepares for a fight.)
(As Sly whacks El Jefe repeatedly.)
- Don't you know that electricity will make your hair all frizzy?
- You can't win this fight!
(After the first round, El Jefe jumps onto the hanging platform and swings from it, causing it to fall and fill the gap.)
(Sly continues to pursue El Jefe.)
El Jefe: Burn, Cooper!
Sly Cooper: For such a tough guy, he sure runs away a lot.
(As Sly gets closer.)
El Jefe: Stand still!
(Sly approaches El Jefe the third time.)
El Jefe: You are an arrogant pest!
(As Sly whacks El Jefe repeatedly.)
- There's no escape, Cooper!
- You actually thought you could beat me?!
(El Jefe leaps forward.)
El Jefe: Estúpido rata!
(Takes his sword and slices through the steel of the crane, causing it to fall.)
El Jefe: Hey, Cooper - How do you like my "crane" style? Hahahahaha!
Sly Cooper: I don't know what's scarier. El Jefe? Or his lame jokes?
(As Sly gets closer to El Jefe.)
El Jefe: Hahahaha! You have no chance!
El Jefe: You ring-tailed rat!
Sly Cooper: I have to get Rioichi's cane back.
(Sly reaches El Jefe on the final platform.)
El Jefe: Why won't you quit?!
(As Sly hits him repeatedly.)
- How do you like my "cane" style?
- You're gonna wish you never met me!
(After taking the final hit.)
El Jefe: Im... possible!
(El Jefe falls unconscious. Sly tries to take the cane, but is ambushed by rat troopers, who take the cane and escape on the large blimp.)
No No Bad KittenEdit
Sly Cooper (narrating): El Jefe was defeated, disgraced and delivered to the cops, but it was a hollow victory. I failed to get back Rioichi's cane, and we still had no idea who was really behind this whole thing. One thing was for sure - it was somebody powerful enough to have his own private army.
Sly Cooper (narrating): We contacted Dimitri for an update on the Thievius Raccoonus, and it looked like "Tennessee Kid" Cooper needed our help next. That meant we needed to travel back to the 1880s. Luckily, one of the goons that took Rioichi's cane had dropped what looked like an old sheriff's badge. Bentley had been trying to figure out where it might be from, but now, it all made sense. After sampling the badge, Bentley was able to calibrate the time machine. As we prepared to make the jump back to the Old West, I found myself wondering how Carmelita was doing.
Episode 2: Go West Young Raccoon Edit
Go West Young Raccoon Edit
Sly Cooper (narrating): We arrived in the Wild West looking for my ancestor: "Tennessee Kid" Cooper. A legendary outlaw whose bank robberies were some of the most daring in Cooper lore. When we arrived, it took some time to locate him, but we eventually found him... in prison. His arrest was the handiwork of the local sheriff who had celebrated by posting his own picture all over town. Talk about an ego. We needed to bust Tennessee out of jail, but after some furious calculation, Bentley determined that the best way to do... that was from the inside. For the first time in my career, I was gonna have to let the law catch me. This could be a real challenge.
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, they're already rigging a noose for Tennessee, so we don't have time for a complicated plan. All my data points to one thing - The quickest route inside that prison is to get yourself arrested!
Sly Cooper: Get myself arrested? I trust you, Bentley, but I'm not sure about getting locked up in this town.
Bentley (binocucom): Sorry, Sly. It's the only way we're going to reach Tennessee in time. There's just one problem: They're holding Kid Cooper in the Maximum security wing. To get yourself thrown in there, you're going to have to gain 'Outlaw' status, so you need to make sure you build a rep before they catch you! Otherwise, they'll throw you in with the common criminals.
Sly Cooper: Ugh. You mean like, jaywalkers and litterbugs? Not gonna happen.
Bentley (binocucom): Well, around these parts it's probably more like goat thieves and tobacco spitters, but you get the point. For starters, why don't you try defacing all of those posters of the sheriff around this town? That oughta put a burr under his saddle. Get it? Because we're in the Old West? Anyway, I'll just let you get started.
Sly Cooper: Find a poster, make it look goofy, and move on. Just like junior high.
(Sly begins to deface the first poster.)
Bentley (binocucom): I buy that one.
Sly Cooper: Not for sale. It's Puny Greenhorn.
(Sly moves onto the second poster.)
Sly Cooper: Wow, I bet the original artist damage his vision staring at this guy.
(Sly defaces the second poster.)
Bentley (binocucom): Oh, he's gonna hate that one.
Sly Cooper: Let's hope so. It's called: No good lawman.
(Sly goes to the third poster.)
Sly Cooper: If I was as homely as this guy, I would not hang my picture everywhere.
(Sly defaces the third poster.)
Bentley (binocucom): Excellent work, Sly.
Sly Cooper: I wish I could tear em down. Here's: Weakling of the West.
(Sly moves onto the fourth poster.)
Sly Cooper: I don't think vain begins to describe this guy.
(He defaces the fourth poster.)
Bentley (binocucom): That's a beaut, Sly.
Sly Cooper: It's an improvement. I'll name this one: The Homely Buckaroo.
(Sly heads to the fifth poster.)
Sly Cooper: What kind of sheriff puts up posters of himself?
(Sly defaces the fifth poster.)
Bentley (binocucom): Wow Sly. You made him look even worse.
Sly Cooper: I love a challenge. I'll name this one: Ten Star Loser.
(Sly goes to the final poster.)
Sly Cooper: This guy's a real ego maniac.
(Sly defaces the final poster.)
Bentley (binocucom): I think you just achieved troublemaker status, Sly.
(Two guards are seen laughing at one of the defaced poster. The sheriff named Toothpick appears.)
Toothpick: (growls) Now this really chaps my hide! I'm gonna find this "artiste" and bust his thumbs! And maybe his pinkie.
Bentley (binocucom): Heh heh, we definitely got under his skin, Sly. You ready for phase two?
Sly Cooper: Absolutely!
Bentley (binocucom): Apparently, the sheriff also loves lollipops, but his favorite is a particular Cuban variety which has to be shipped in specially. Supposedly they taste like rice and beans.
Sly Cooper: (groans in disgust) Gross!
Bentley (binocucom): Agreed. But if we clean him out, he'll have to wait weeks for the next shipment, and that should really tick him off!
(Sly steals Toothpick's lollipop.)
Sly Cooper: Hmmm. I bet Murray would like that lollipop.
Bentley (binocucom): Great job. You just became a criminal, Sly.
(Sly approaches a banner.)
Bentley (binocucom): Alright, this is going perfectly! You'll be locked up in no time!
Sly Cooper: You know, you're a little too excited about sending me to the slammer, Bentley.
Bentley (binocucom): It's all about the job, Sly. Speaking of which, in case you hadn't noticed, this Sheriff Toothpick is his own biggest fan! In fact, it looks like he's throwing himself a festival and it's in full swing! If you take that banner down, I'm sure it'll be the final straw!
Sly Cooper: Right. Let's go rain on this guy's parade.
Sly Cooper: Okay. I just need to get up to that banner. Of all the things to get busted for, I can't believe it's banner dumping.
Sly Cooper: Okay, there's the banner. I just need to knock those clothespins off.
(Sly knocks all the clothespins causing the banner to fall down. Just then, Toothpick and his guards arrive.)
Toothpick: Hold your fire, boys! That there's the scribblin', lolly-thievin', outlaw I been looking for!
(Sly jumps down)
Toothpick: Ah. Well, amigo, you just booked yourself a permanent room in the stony lonesome!
(Two guards surround Sly and dress him in his Jailbird Costume.)
Bentley: Looks like it's up to me to recon the area. I need to get some shots of that prison, but I better keep a low profile. I don't want to alert the guards.
Bentley sees the prison tower
Bentley: Sly and "Tennessee Kid" Cooper are in that high tower. (takes a picture of the Prison Tower)
Bentley goes over to a cannon and some TNT barrels
Bentley: Hmm. That's an interesting sign. Let me get a shot (takes a picture of the Arsenal) Huh. Unless I'm mistaken, that is definitely a munition's dump. Very handy.
Bentley then goes over to the Back wall
Bentley: Aha. There is clearly some structural weakness along the rear wall. (takes a picture of the Back Wall)
Meanwhile, a guard is escorting Sly to the Maximum Security wing. Another guard opens the door to allow Sly to go in. The guard then closes the door. Sly looks over to see "Tennessee Kid" Cooper. Sly goes over to him
Sly Cooper: Um Howdy...
"Tennessee Kid" Cooper: Howdy yourself. Looks like you must've ticked ol' Toothpick off pretty good. I like that. You got a name?
Sly Cooper: It's Sly. Sly Cooper
"Tennessee Kid" Cooper: (offended) Now Son, you should know I don't take kindly to folks funnin' on my family name.
Sly Cooper: Whoa whoa whoa. I swear I'm not joking. I can explain...
"Tennessee Kid" Cooper: Talk ain't worth spit, boy! Only one way to prove you're a Cooper. Bust us outta here!
Sly Cooper: Right. My friend Bentley is working on that... I hope.
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, press the square button to swing that ball. (Sly uses his iron ball to smash the wall) Sly, you need to make your way to the bottom of the tower. (Sly jumps out of the tower) Sly, here's your chance! Use the ball to break down that door and bust Tennessee out.
Sly Cooper: Okay "Kid". Stand clear
(Sly smashes the door allowing Tennessee to escape)
"Tennessee Kid" Cooper: All right! I guess break time is over
Sly Cooper (narrating): Somehow, we had managed to survive and make it back to the hideout. Once there, Tennessee gave us the lowdown. How he had been planning the bank heist that should've gone down in Cooper lore as his masterpiece. Only to have a mysterious new sheriff arrest him before he even reached the bank. Curiously, the robbery still occurred and the bank's gold was stolen. Tennessee was charged even though he was already in prison and the gold was never recovered. Of course, he had a strong suspicion it was Sheriff Toothpick himself that has stolen the gold and framed him and after a little research, there was no doubt he was right. Bentley was able to uncover plenty of information about the "Sheriff". Although he change his appearance somewhat, Toothpick was a two bit gangster from present day Eastern Europe. According to his file, he'd grown up loving two things: gold and cowboy movies. He eventually specialized in gold robberies and for a while, had masterminded some of the largest scores around the world. Then he abruptly vanished. The word was, he had always thought of himself as a gunslinger and it looked like he had found a way to make that a reality. The guy was a real loose cannon. We'd have to watch our backs if we were gonna steal back the missing gold and restore "Tennessee Kid" Cooper's reputation as the greatest outlaw of the Old West.
Cooper for HireEdit
Bentley: Okay, the first order of business is getting Tennessee his guns back.
"Tennessee Kid" Cooper: Well, it's just the one gun now. I upgrade it, but yeah I need my shooting iron back.
Bentley: Agreed. According to my sources, Toothpick blows this old gold mine several months ago declaring it unsafe. In fact, he's converted it to a storage facility for his stolen goods including Tennessee's gun. We'll need to take measures with this job so as not to arouse suspicion. So by employing a masterful disguise, I'll tail Toothpick to the mine's entrance and mark it with a homing beacon. Murray, you'll then use the beacon to find your way there. Toothpick sure to have secure the entrance so we'll need your... formidable skills to get it open. Then once we have access, Tennessee can get in and get his gun back. Let's get to work!
Bentley is seen wearing a disguise as he tails Toothpick
Bentley: Okay, I need to keep up with this guy. I better stay close, but out of direct sight
Bentley (binocucom): Toothpick's office is somewhere in the upper levels of the saloon. To find out what he's planning, our best bet is to plant a bug. Needless to say, we must remain undetected. Conveniently, I discovered they're looking for a new bartender, so I'll go in - undercover - and control the situation by introducing the patrons to my special home-brewed sarsaparilla.
Sly Cooper: Your mustache looks... bigger. What have you been feeding it?
Bentley (binocucom): Pay attention, Sly. You'll need to enter through that window and make your way to the ventilation system. Meanwhile, I'll have the goons inside so sugared up, they'll be seeing double until they crash. Hard. Once you launch the RC Car in the vents, I'll take control and guide it to Toothpick's office.
Sly Cooper: You're not going to start wearing that mustache all the time, are you?
Bentley (binocucom): Jealously is such an ugly emotion, Sly.
(Sly and Bentley proceed to sneak into the saloon.)
Sly Cooper: Watch your back, pal. This place looks pretty rough.
Bentley: Will do. See you inside!
(Bentley walks in through the front door.)
Bentley: Greetings! I've been informed this establishment is in dire need of an expert tap jockey?
(Sly then sneaks in through the window.)
Bentley: Uh... I've got sarsaparilla...?
(Before Bentley begins serving his drink.)
Bentley: Whoa, these guys look thirsty! Let's see, I can move left or right simply by moving the left stick. When a patron steps up to the bar, I can slide him a drink by pressing the X button. These guys don't look like patient types, so I better make it fast. I better keep an eye on the sarsaparilla gauge. It's going to take my whole supply to quiet this bunch. The meter should indicate how much sarsaparilla I have left. Something tells me it's going to take every drop.
(As Bentley serves the guards their drinks.)
- Let's see if the supply outlast them then.
- These guys are soaking it up like sponges!
- These guys aren't just thirsty, they're crazy!
- It is not great!
- Jeez, this is making me thirsty.
(When the guards begin asking for two drinks.)
- Those big guys look like they're going to need more than one drink.
(After Bentley finishes serving drinks.)
Sly Cooper: Whoa! Some of the guards are still awake. I will need to be careful. I just need to stay off the floor.
(As Sly approaches the crawl space.)
Bentley (binocucom): Looking good, Sly.
(Sly presses on until he busts through a wall using his ball and chain.)
Bentley (binocucom): Nice, Sly! You're on a roll!
(Sly enters a large room.)
Bentley (binocucom): Great, Sly! You just need to reach the ventilation duct.
(As Sly gets closer to the vent.)
Sly Cooper: Just a little further to that vent.
(Upon reaching the vent.)
Bentley (binocucom): Alright, Sly. Launch that little beauty!
(Sly pushes the RC car into the ventilation shaft.)
Bentley (binocucom): Alright, baby, let's see what you can do for Bentley.
(When approaching the spinning fans.)
Bentley (binocucom): Uh-oh, those vents will blow me off course!
(When approaching the spiders.)
Bentley (binocucom): Stay away from my car, you eight-legged bullies!
(When approaching more spiders.)
Bentley (binocucom): I can't let those spiders take a bite on the RC car!
(When approaching spiders for the third time.)
Bentley (binocucom): Yikes, scoot back. Spiders!
(Bentley makes it to the vent in Toothpick's office.)
Toothpick: Alright, listen up! My pardner's got an ace up his sleeve, and we're about to go all in! This trump card's gonna crush Cooper and the rest of his claim-jumping gang! We're gonna learn 'em you don't yank a rattlesnake's tail less'n yer lookin' to get bit! Har har! Then, we're gonna finish loadin' up that train and haul our sweet, little keisters outta of this one-horse town! Once we get that loot back into present day, I, Toothpick, gonna be worth billions!
(Toothpick accidentally shoots one of his guards.)
Toothpick: Eh... Ooops.
Guard: Dangit, boss! Would ya watch where you're pointin' that thing?
(Toothpick becomes enraged.)
Toothpick: Are you talkin' to me??!
Guard: Whoa, boss, whoa!! I'm sorry! I didn't mean nuthin'!
"Tennessee Kid" Cooper: Hmm, that's not good - looks like Toothpick rustled himself a pretty lady!
Bentley (binocucom): Sweet jumping jackrabbits! That's no lady, that's Carmelita! What is she doing here?
"Tennessee Kid" Cooper: You know her?!
Bentley (binocucom): I'm afraid so! Something is very wrong here, Tennessee! But all quantum physics aside, we have to rescue her! Nobody can get there faster than you! I'll grab Sly and Murray and we'll meet you with the van. Just get going!
(Tennessee makes his way to the door.)
"Tennessee Kid" Cooper: Hmm, I wonder who Bentley's lady friend is.
"Tennessee Kid" Cooper: That Toothpick's lower than a snake in a ditch!
"Tennessee Kid" Cooper: Heck, rescuing pretty ladies is a hobby of mine anyway.
(Tennessee enters the door and spots Toothpick far off.)
Toothpick: Phew, I'm only too happy to get rid of this one. Her tongue's sharp enough to cut leather!
Carmelita Fox: Stinking Cowards! Afraid to untie me and fight like men?! I swear when I get out of this...!
Toothpick: No sense frettin' about that, little lady. Cry little tear, yes. Just enjoy the ride! Har har!
Carmelita Fox: (narrating) When I saw that arrogant little... no-good... lying.. OOH! I should have tied his mangy tail around his neck! I should have blasted that smug look right off his face! I.. I, I! (sigh) I should probably just finish my story. After the Cooper Gang escaped at the museum, I decided to follow my nose, and take a look around. I've been investigating the trading of stolen antiquities on the black market. But I never guessed that two-faced ringtail was involved. Then, as I turned a corner, I was stunned to see a huge stash of stolen treasure right there in the museum! And even more shocking, Cyrille Le Paradox himself unloading them! I couldn't believe it! The billionaire art collector and museum patron was behind this? I was so surprised that by the time I reacted, his goons already had me covered. Then, that slimy sawed-off runt had me thrown into some vile machine. And the next thing I knew, I was playing cowboys and criminals. The Old West?! Time travel?! It was completely Loco! Sure, Le Paradox had done some time in his youth, but he'd been squeaky clean ever since. And INTERPOL had never considered him a suspect. There were rumors about the source of his wealth, but nothing had ever been proven. Now I KNEW I'd solve that mystery. And of course, Cooper and his little friends were involved somehow. Why was I not surprised? The fleabag tried to feed me some story about having to rob the museum to save the future. I was done listening to that liar! I needed to get back to Paris. But that toad, Toothpick, had stolen Murray's van, and Bentley's time machine along with it! I finally cracked the case and now I was stuck in this lousy dustbowl with the Cooper Gang. I don't know what made me angrier, not being able to bust the lowlife skunk, or being trapped here with that lying ringtail. (sigh) The only bearable thing about this whole mess was that at least Cooper's ancestor was a gentleman.
Grand Key LarcenyEdit
Operation: Gold DiggerEdit
Sly Cooper: (narrating) As the van hurtled into the ravine, it felt like we were in slow motion. The thought that our adventures were over flashed through my mind as we braced for the crash. Then, in desperation, Bentley grabbed the closest thing at hand, Murray's Australian fossil necklace. And used it in the time machine. He saved our lives. But now we had no idea where we were headed. We held on as the van was sucked through the wormhole, tumbling around like a cork in the ocean. Who knew where we'd land. And more importantly...WHEN.
Episode 3: Clan of the Cave RaccoonEdit
Clan of the Cave RaccoonEdit
Sly Cooper (narrating): Things weren't going very well. We'd landed somewhere from the looks of it. Prehistoric. I was slightly concerned when Bentley broke out the dinosaur repellent, but that was the least of my worries. The crash landing had damaged the van so the time machine wasn't working properly. Not only was traveling back to Paris impossible, but we couldn't even raise Dimitri on the transceiver. Also, we still had no idea how Le Paradox had managed to develop his own time machine and that was a scary thought.
Sly Cooper (narrating): Carmelita was still really hot about things. I just wanted a chance to explain, to tell her how sorry I was for getting her mixed up in all of this. Before we had a chance to talk, she stormed off in a rage. I tried going after her, but I figured that wasn't the best idea. Our conversation would have to wait. At least until she holsters that pistol. We decided the first order of business was to figure out where and when we were. And then, how we're going to repair the van. Otherwise, we'd have to get used to living in a cave. Permanently.
Stone Age ReconnaissanceEdit
Bentley: Bad news just got worse, Sly. Looks like a couple of pieces of the time drive broke off of that crash landing. I need you to track down the missing components A.S.A.P. Fortunately, the advanced trajectoral management processor is still functional, so I was able to calculate their most likely positions. Unfortunately, they seem to have landed in some dangerous terrain. The temporal sprocket appears to have fallen close to some pterodactyl nests and I'm afraid one of these prehistoric penguins... might've gotten it's flippers on the Gravity Encabulator. Oh, they may look cute, but those little devils are nasty. This isn't going to be a simple pickup, Sly. Get some photos of their precise locations and I'll analyze them to formulate a plan. But watch your back, I don't think we're the first guests at this party. See the structure on that mountain? It appears to be some kind of conveyor belt system. Definitely not Ice Age technology. Get a picture of that machinery too. I smell a rat or possibly something even worse.
Sly Cooper: Bentley, uh have you heard anything from Carmelita?
Bentley (binocucom): Sorry, Sly. I think maybe she just needs to cool off. For what it's worth, I'm just as worried about Penelope.
Sly Cooper: I know pal and we're gonna get her back. I promise
Sly takes a picture of the Gravity Encabulator inside a penguin
Bentley (binocucom): Perfecto, Sly! I'll find a way to pry the Encabulator out of their dastardly beaks.
Sly Cooper: I don't know, Bentley. These little guys don't look so bad to me.
Sly takes a picture of the Temporal Sprocket
Bentley (binocucom): Very nice, Sly. Getting a shot of that pterodactyl took some skill.
Sly Cooper: Yeah. Let's come back when I don't look so...appetizing.
Sly takes a picture of the Conveyor
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, that conveyor belt does not belong here. The question is: What it's being used for?
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, I'm picking something up. Look for a building that resembles and arena and let's take a closer look. My thermal vision is picking up a lot of activity there.
Sly Cooper: You got it pal
Sly heads over to the arena and sees a bear named Grizz painting on a wall.
Grizz: One... two... got a masterpiece for you!
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, get a shot of that guy and maybe we can identify him!
Sly takes a picture of The Grizz
Sly Cooper: Okay, no way this guy dug that bling up around here.
Bentley (binocucom): No, you're absolutely right, Sly. He definitely doesn't belong here. This whole place demands an investigation. Let's start by figuring out who we're with dealing here.
Bentley (binocucom): Good job, Sly. Now head back to the hideout.
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, we need to figure out what that bear is up to. That crack in the wall looks like the perfect entrance, but you better keep a low profile until we know what's going on.
Sly Cooper: I hear you, pal
Sly goes inside the Arena through the crack.
Sly Cooper: Still no word from Carmelita?
Bentley (binocucom): Don't worry, Sly. I'm sure we'll hear from her soon.
Mammoth guard #1: I know! I heard when Joe messed up, the boss turned him into a coat for that Le Paradox guy!
Mammoth guard #2: Yeah, that Le Paradox is bad news. I heard last time he was here, he yanked this one guy's tusks. Just for fun!
Mammoth guard #1: Ouch. Yeah, good luck talking to the ladies without any tusks.
Bentley (binocucom): Watch yourself, Sly and don't alert the guards
Sly Cooper: I hear ya, pal
Sly sneaks through the arena. He then sees a large raccoon being caught in the net by a bunch of rats.
Sly Cooper: Wow, I'm glad I'm not that poor guy. What's weird is that he looks kinda familiar...
Bentley (binocucom): Wait... holy missing links! Sly, that's a prehistoric raccoon! I wonder if he could be...?
Sly Cooper: ... my ancestor?
Bentley (binocucom): It's a distinct possibility. Let's help him out! Sly, I have an idea, but you need to get that Sabertooth tiger skin! Just don't let the guards see you!
Sly Cooper: I'm on it, Bentley. One tiger skin, comin' up.
Large and in ChargeEdit
Sly Cooper (narrating): We got... Bob safely back to the hideout, where everyone took an immediate liking to him. And he took an immediate interest in our gadgets. While he was busy, Bentley provided the background on his former captor. The guy's name was Grizz, and he had made his fame in the art world. Once a common street thug, he'd been thrust into the limelight when he was plucked from the gutter and made famous by a prominent pop artist. Grizz's primitive artwork was hailed as a brilliant new style called "paleo-graffiti." And for a while, he enjoyed his celebrity status. His fame was short-lived, however, when people realized his art was really just... bad. Resentful, he returned to his criminal roots, quickly becoming the top art thief on INTERPOL's Most Wanted list.
Sly Cooper (narrating): One of Carmelita's main targets, it was now clear how he managed to evade her capture for so long. After we pried Bob away from Bentley's tools, he explained how Grizz had appeared and started harvesting all the pterodactyl eggs in the area, eliminating his role as food provider for the tribe and greatest egg thief ever. Depressed, he'd gone into a slump, and gotten out of shape, which allowed Grizz to capture him and take the new "tool" he'd invented to steal eggs. So, it looked like the very first Cooper cane had been stolen as well... great. We may have rescued Bob from the arena, but we still needed to find out what sort of operation Grizz was running for Le Paradox, and why it involved stealing all the eggs. We also needed Bob's help to find the rest of the van parts, and that meant we had to get him back into climbing shape... fast.
Bentley (binocucom): Okay Murray, we need... Bob's... help to recover the lost components, but he's in terrible condition. It's up to you to get him back into climbing shape!
Murray: No problem, Bentley. The Murray knows what it takes to be a champion! (to Bob) Alright, listen up- Playtime is over! Your job is to get back in shape... and my job is to make that happen! To do that, The Murray is taking your training to the next level! Look around, we'll be using your standard training exercises: Slippery Slope, Penguin Popper, Sumo Slap, Duck and Cover, Super Sling, and Whack-a-Chump.
"Bob" Cooper: Standard exercises?
Murray: Okay, so maybe they're not your standard exercises, but they are Murray approved, so let's get started!
("Bob" goes over to the Whack-a-Chump mini game.)
Murray: A real fighter knows when to strike, and when to back off. Like whether or not to have one more pepperoni and chocolate chip burrito. To make these split-second calls, you need precision. Our little penguin pals are gonna start poppin' out of those holes, along with some fakes. Just make sure you hit the real birds!
("Bob" wins the Whack-a-Chump mini game earning himself a medal.)
Murray: Oh yeah that's picking your punches, chum.
Starving Starving HippoEdit
Bentley (binocucom): I knew it! Those little tuxedo terrors are the real pests!
Murray: Uh, they're just penguins, Bentley.
Ice Ice BentleyEdit
Bentley (binocucom): Okay Sly, this one's pretty simple - Tail Grizz until you get the code to his fortress. We need to get in there if we're going to stop him. You shouldn't have any trouble finding him since he's tagged with the homing darts. Just follow the signal
Sly Cooper: We probably didn't even need the darts. He's kinda hard to miss.
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, he's on the move, Sly. Stay close, so I can pull the data we need off his phone. And don't underestimate him, he's no lightweight!
(Sly tails Grizz)
Grizz: It ain't yo bus, my name is the Grizz. You see I'm hairy and scary and all of that stuff. Get the heck out of my way or I'm gonna get rough. Word. Gonna make me a fortune I'm the greatest around, all I gotta do is paint my art in the ground.
(Grizz's phone rings)
Grizz: What? (answers his phone) Fool, you tryin to run some kinda game on the Grizz? I'm tired of you tellin me to walk the line straight when you walkin it all crooked. Yeah, that's right. Uh uh. Uh uh. No. No. No. That ain't the deal we had. Nuh uh. No. I got you the cane that the big ol hairy dude made. Now you need to hook me up! Hook me up, yeah! Hol-Hold on, I'm losing signal. Hold- I said I'm losing signal. I said... Hold on... I can't... Hold on
Sly Cooper: You catch that, Bentley?
Bentley (binocucom): Yeah, sounds like he's talking to Le Paradox and there's trouble. Don't lose him
(Sly continues to tail Grizz)
Grizz: You got the Grizz! Living large with a brush, don't step on my canvas cause you'll get crushed.
Carmelita Fox (narrating): I caught up with the ringtail to give him the intel I gathered on Grizz. Half of me still wanted to slap the smirk off his face, but the other half wanted to talk. Working on my own these past few days have given me time to think and I'd realized some things. Sly may have been lying to me the whole time in Paris, but I'd lied to myself as well. In my heart, I knew something was up. But I didn't want to admit it. I wanted to believe he'd changed. That maybe, I changed him. But Sly was who he was. And I had to accept that. Although this crazy time traveling business has given me a new perspective on that too. In the past, I always chased Sly, arriving on the scene after the fact. But now that I fought alongside him, with Bentley, Murray, and his ancestors, I had to admit a newfound respect. We aren't really so different. We both fight for justice, we just do it on opposite sides of the law. The question is: Can I live with that? Honestly, I don't know. But for now, perhaps it's enough that I see things more clearly and that we have a common enemy in Le Paradox. Because I am not going anywhere until I put that stinking weasel behind bars!
Operation: Jurassic ThieveryEdit
Bentley: All right. The time has come to deal with Grizz. This guy is a menace to the time continuum. Not to mention the arts. And it's time to shut him and his counterfeit cave painting production down. It appears he's already beefed up security. So he's probably expecting us. But thanks to Carmelita, we have complete schematics of his mountain base. So once we get inside, I'll be able to target the egg vats and make sure they're scrambled. Just a little... egg humor. Heh. Next, Bob you'll need to climb the main generator tower and pry the pressure valves open to completely disrupt power. That should start a fatal chain reaction in the system. Murray, at this point you'll have to get to the master control panel and make sure no one can reset the system before the damage is done. Of course, you'll need to use your pugilistic skills on any guards that might get in your way. After this, the system will be completely disabled and we can do a little bear hunting. Sly, it'll be your job to take down Grizz when we find him. Well that's the plan. You should all be clear on what needs to be done. So let's get out there and put this bear on ice.
New Found RespectEdit
Sly Cooper (narrating): Carmelita had cooled off.. a bit. But she hadn't forgiven me yet, and I couldn't blame her. The last thing she wanted to do was join up with a bunch of thieves. Something that went against everything she stood for. I could tell it was a tough decision, but in the end, she knew it was probably her only shot at busting Le Paradox.
Sly Cooper (narrating): Dimitri was happy to finally hear from us as he'd been worried "His bros were warping their faces off!" Whatever that meant. He pointed us to our next destination, Medieval England. And, as it turned out, Grizz's crown was the perfect object to get us there. So although we'd only uncovered this Ice Age Scheme by accident, luck was definitely on our side. And we left in a confident mood. Ready to tackle whatever fate had in store for us.
Episode 4: Of Mice and MechsEdit
Of Mice and MechsEdit
Sly Cooper (narrating): We've come to merry old England to locate my ancestor: Sir Galleth Cooper. A gallant knight who founded the Cooper Order. Unfortunately, what we found was anything but regal. Sir Galleth had been reduced to performing in a local circus as a jester complete with ridiculous costume. The villainous stench of Le Paradox hung over the entire area. We didn't know what was going on yet, but we knew it wasn't good. To make matters worse, we still had no information about Penelope. Bentley wasn't letting it show, but I knew deep down, he was pretty worried. Hopefully, we would find some answers soon. But first, we had to go to the circus.
Bentley (binocucom): First off, Sly, you'll need a more appropriate outfit to infiltrate the circus. But in order to do that, I'm going to need some raw materials. The trick is going to be finding some quality wood, leather and metal.
Sly Cooper (binocucom): Sure. Anything else you want me to pick up while I'm out? Eggs, milk... maybe some wax for your shell?
Bentley (binocucom) Just get going, Sly.
(Sly makes his way to the waypoint, then eavesdrops on the guards.)
Guard #1: Your bearings are grinding again. Sounds like you need some oil.
Guard #2: Tell me about it. I had to take the kids to the beach last weekend.
Guard #1: Man, I HATE sand.
Guard #2: Oh yeah, it's the worst.
Guard #1: I wish it was break-time. I really need a pint of fuel.
Guard #2: Yeah, we should head over to the Tavern. I hear the new metal alloy in the mixers adds a nice tangy flavor.
(The guards walk away.)
Bentley (binocucom): That's it! Head to the Tavern, Sly.
(Sly heads over to the Tavern and enters through a hatch.)
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, my readings show the presence of a particularly durable metal alloy. That's what we want.
Sly Cooper: Man, this place smells like gas.
Bentley (binocucom): That's probably the guards, Sly.
Sly Cooper: Not that kind of gas! I mean fuel.
Bentley (binocucom): Well, stay away from any open flames and grab that sample!
(As Sly makes his way across the room.)
Sly Cooper: Fuel and fire in the same room? That's smart.
(As Sly continues towards his target.)
Sly Cooper: Too bad they don't serve root beer.
(Sly grabs the metal sample.)
Bentley (binocucom): You did it, Sly!
(Sly goes back outside to eavesdrop on more guards.)
Guard #1: You hear about Kraemer?
Guard #2: No, what happened?
Guard #1: Poor guy managed to get his rebigulator demagnetized.
Guard #2: Oooh, man. That's gotta hurt!
Guard #1: Yeah, I try to stay away from metal... that's not me, I mean.
Guard #2: You should transfer to the Bakery. Nothing but wood and bread in there.
(Once the eavesdropping is over.)
Bentley (binocucom): Great, Sly! Head to the Bakery and grab some wood.
(Sly heads to the Bakery and approaches the hacking terminal.)
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, Sly, let's see if I can fake a little code to get you inside.
(The System Cracker hack begins.)
(Bentley passes through the system until he approaches a pink switch.)
Bentley: Hmm, my Panzer's gigabombs should trigger that switch.
(He continues until he encounters some mine drones.)
Bentley: Great, mine drones. I need to steer clear of their mines.
(Bentley continues on until he defeats a larger enemy.)
Bentley: The bigger they are, the harder they fall!
(Bentley continues until the hack is complete.)
(Sly enters the first room of the Bakery.)
Bentley (binocucom): Something's funny. My readings show this place is producing a lot more power than it needs for baking.
Sly Cooper: Maybe there's a secret doughnut facility?
Bentley (binocucom): Maybe you should give the jokes a rest and see if you can find some wood?
Sly Cooper: Huh. Fine. See if I bring you back any doughnuts.
(Sly walks near the flaming oven doors.)
Bentley (binocucom): If you can't stand the heat, try closing those oven doors, Sly.
Sly Cooper: This place is making me hungry.
(Sly grabs the wood.)
Bentley (binocucom): Perfect!
(Sly exits the Bakery, then finds more guards to eavesdrop on.)
Guard #1: You going to company picnic this year?
Guard #2: I dunno. It's always the same thing. I'm tired of playing carnival games at the circus.
Guard #1: Yeah, but remember the archery contest last year when Bryner somehow shot himself in the foot?
Guard #2: Hahaha. Oh man. Okay, that was worth it. I guess I'll go.
Guard #1: Yeah, I was thinking I should wear some leather boots or something. In case of stray arrows, you know?
Guard #2: Oooh, good idea! Maybe you could get some at the Shoemaker's?
(The guards leave.)
Bentley (binocucom): Sounds like it's time for a trip to the Shoemaker's.
(Sly enters the Shoemaker's.)
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, Sly, there's bound to be some leather in there. Find it.
(Sly sneaks his way to the other side of the wall.)
Sly Cooper: Bentley, this doesn't look like any medieval cobbler's I've seen.
Bentley (binocucom): Yeah, even women's shoe stores aren't this diabolical!
Sly Cooper: There's something fishy going on here.
Bentley (binocucom): I agree. For now, just find the leather and get out of there!
(Sly makes it over to the leather.)
Sly Cooper: What is it with bad guys and lasers?
(Sly grabs the leather.)
Bentley (binocucom): Great job! With those materials, I'm going to be able to make you some very useful items.
The Time is NowEdit
Sly Cooper (narrating): Once Sir Galleth calmed down, we returned to the hideout and got the whole story. The surrounding area was held in the iron grip of a fearsome Black Knight. His origin was a mystery, but his power and technological might was impressive. He'd even created a new type of robotic guard which patrolled tirelessly and without mercy. Galleth had been captured when he tried to take on these guards single-handedly. Bentley searched every criminal database in existence, but couldn't find a thing. All we had were more questions. Had Le Paradox somehow made an ally from this time period? And how had this Black Knight managed to create those mechanical monsters? When we explained to Sir Galleth who we really were, I don't know if he believed us or not, but it didn't matter. He just started ranting about, "Taking the fight to the enemy and restoring the Cooper Honor!" Needless to say, the guy was a little intense. Until we figure out what was going on, I can see we were gonna have to keep him on a short leash.
Bentley (binocucom): Sly! It appears the Black Knight has a patrol moving an object in a locked case through the town. From the level of security, I bet the farm it's Galleth's cane.
Sly Cooper: You have a farm?
Bentley (binocucom): Just get over there! If what Galleth says is true, the Black Knight almost never leaves his castle. And when he does, it's only to briefly visit the Blacksmith Shop. This may be the one opportunity we have to steal the cane back!
Sly Cooper: Okay, time to join the parade.
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, before you make a move, get some pictures of the Black Knight and that case. We need to figure out who and what we're dealing with.
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, make sure your shot of the Black Knight is from the front. I want a closer look at his armor.
(Sly snaps a photo of the Black Knight.)
Sly Cooper: Well, that's a little dark. Too bad this thing doesn't have a flash.
Bentley (binocucom): Sly, get a shot of that security case. I need to see that lock.
(Sly snaps a photo of the security case.)
Bentley (binocucom): Very nice, Sly! I can crack that thing with my eyes closed. But just get to that cage before they reach the Blacksmith Shop, and I'll hack it remotely.
(Dialogue heard from the Black Knight, while Sly takes out the guards.)
- This blasted suit is so hot!
- I really should invent some super deodorant for Le Paradox.
- Blasted Cooper Gang!
- I wonder if I could program one of the guards to give me a haircut. On second thought, that's probably a really bad idea.
(If the Black Knight spots Sly.)
- I'm going to make you into some nice, furry slippers.
- Well, well, well, what a sad little excuse for a thief.
- I didn't realize they made thieves this stupid.
- Another foolish thief! You're kind never learns!
- Seize him! No common thief bests me!
- A valiant effort, but... you lose.
- Stealing from me? That will be your last mistake!
- Are you the runt who took my guards?! Any last words?
- Stupid rodent! Let's see how you'll like my dungeon!
- A thief, really? It's almost amusing, but not.
- Ha! The Black Knight fooled by a lowly vermin? Never!
- I will grind you into paste!
- Your audacity is matched only by your incompetence.
- You little scoundrel! I'll feed you to my dragon!
- What a strange looking creature. Put it in the circus.
- How ridiculous! An overgrown runt with a cane.
- Nobody steals from me!
(Sly defeats the first guard.)
Bentley (binocucom): Great! Keep it up!
(While Sly waits for the second guard to return to his post.)
- Hurry up, Sly! If they reach the Blacksmith's, we're done!
- Sly, if we don't get Galleth's cane back, he won't be able to help us.
- If you fall behind, we're finished!
- Don't fall behind, Sly!
- Don't lose him, Sly! This is the only chance we'll get.
(Sly defeats the second guard.)
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, Sly, just get to that case.
(Sly approaches the case.)
Bentley (binocucom): Time to crack that case!
(The job is complete after the hack is finished.)
Eye in the SkyEdit
Bentley (binocucom): Listen, Sir Galleth, those balloons above us are more than just decorations for the circus. The Black Knight can use them to monitor our movements and conversations.
Sir Galleth Cooper: Pray tell, how can such a thing be possible?
Bentley (binocucom): It's... complicated. Let's just say those balloons have machines that are like eyes and ears that can detect things at great distance, and you are the only one who can reach them.
Sir Galleth Cooper: Say no more! I shall go forth to smash these airborne demons, lest they set their wicked gaze upon us! Find me a catapult, and a very large rock.
Bentley (binocucom): Hold on a minute! First, you should find locations to use your Catapult Crash technique and reach those balloons safely. Then you can destroy the machines.
Sir Galleth Cooper: Eh... of course. As you will.
Sir Galleth Cooper: Ah, the perfect opportunity to apply my Catapult Crash technique!
Sir Galleth Cooper: I shall destroy these cursed devices!
(Climbing the first tower.)
Sir Galleth Cooper: No mere obstacle can halt my ascent! My Catapult Crash technique is more than powerful enough to smash beyond barriers.
Sir Galleth Cooper: Hmm, the guards appear as mere bugs from this height.
(Reaching the top.)
Bentley (binocucom): Great job, Galleth! Now destroy that surveillance system.
(First balloon down.)
Bentley (binocucom): Awesome! Two more balloons to go.
(Approaching the second tower.)
Sir Galleth Cooper: Ha, this tower is no match for my Catapult Crash technique!
Sir Galleth Cooper: I could scale this tower with one hand!
(Reaching the top.)
Bentley (binocucom): Alright, there's the second system!
(Second balloon down.)
Bentley (binocucom): Excellent! Just one more device and we're done!
Sir Galleth Cooper: Time to complete this quest!
(Climbing the tower.)
Sir Galleth Cooper: The final blow will soon be struck!
(Reaching the top.)
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, Galleth, this is the last one!
(Third balloon down.)
Bentley (binocucom): Outstanding, Galleth! Now our communications will be secure!
Shell Shocked HeartEdit
Sly Cooper (narrating): When Bentley returned to the hideout, he crawled into his shell and wouldn't come out. Nobody could blame him. Penelope may have betrayed our friendship and trust, but she betrayed Bentley's heart. I knew he blamed himself for the whole predicament, but it wasn't his fault. Everyone took turns trying to coax him out, but nothing worked. In the end, it seemed that Bentley would have to come back to us on his own. Unfortunately, we couldn't wait around. We had a villain to take down with or without Bentley's help. And this time, it was personal.
Sly Cooper: We need to take Penelope down, but how? Man, we need Bentley back.
Sir Galleth Cooper: I am still a bit bewildered that the Black Knight was a friend of yours.
Sly Cooper: Yeah, well obviously she's no friend of ours now
Sir Galleth Cooper: In the face of such treachery there is but one option! We storm the castle and smash this villain!
Sly Cooper: Okay, slow down, Turbo. How do we get inside the castle?
Sir Galleth Cooper: That... I know not. However, I do how we may create some exceedingly useful explosive devices. You and I must part ways. I will gather fire bulbs, while you must procure a bottle of Merlin's Magic Powder.
Sly Cooper: Of course, and where would I get this?
Sir Galleth Cooper: Why, at the carnival, of course! I hope your archery skills are satisfactory.
Sly Cooper: Oh, I think I'm up to snuff.
Sir Galleth Cooper: Then the die is cast! Fare thee well!
Sir Galleth jumps off and goes to collect the fire bulbs
Sir Galleth Cooper: I seek the elusive fire bulb. Three should sufficient. One would never have guessed the Black Knight is a lady. (Sir Galleth reaches the first fire bulb tree) A swift strike should dislodge it.
Sir Galleth collects the first fire bulb
Sir Galleth Cooper: Ah. No finest specimen could be found. Now to ferret out two more
Sir Galleth reaches the second fire bulb tree and gets the bulb
Sir Galleth Cooper: One last swipe is needed
He strikes the second fire bulb and obtains it
Sir Galleth Cooper: Yea verily! I need but one more bulb
Sir Galleth then reaches the third bulb tree
Sir Galleth Cooper: One good smack and it should open forthwith.
He obtains the third fire bulb
Sir Galleth Cooper: I hope Sly has given his archery much practice
Sly heads over to the carnival in his archery costume
Owl guard: Step right up ladies and gents! Try your luck in our game of skill! (sees Sly) Why hello, Guvnah! Wanna have a go? Do well enough and you could win yourself one genuine bottle of Merlin's Magic Powder - guaranteed to cure despair, curl your hair, and answer your prayer!
Sly Cooper: So, how is it for making bombs?
Owl guard: Aye, gather some fire bulbs and it's bang-zoom combustion!
Bentley Chalk Talk
Carmelita Fox: Alright troops. Listen up. As you all know, Bentley is still unavailable, but we've gotta come up with a plan. So I'm calling this meeting for him.
Sly Cooper: Hey, Carmelita
Carmelita Fox: Quiet ringtail! We'll have time for your smart remarks! We gotta hit Penelope before she can finish... whatever it is she's trying to finish
Sly Cooper: Yeah, that's kinda what I was going to ask
Carmelita Fox: Look, it's pretty simple. We need to get into that castle. We've got the explosives...
Sly Cooper: I was going to bring that up too
Carmelita Fox: Not another word, Sly!
Sir Galleth Cooper: Your speech does nothing to lift our spirits, Sly
Carmelita Fox: Galleth, do you think we can plant your explosives on the bridge controls?
Sir Galleth Cooper: S'out! This plan rings true!
Carmelita Fox: Okay, everyone get read to move out. After that bridge comes down, we'll have to get in there fast
Sly Cooper: Sorry. I miss the part about what we do when we get inside.
Carmelita Fox: We'll... have to improvise.
Sly Cooper: Sounds good to me.
[Sly defeats Penelope, but his leg gets trapped under the giant knight mech]
Penelope: Do you have any idea what that suit was worth?! It was one of a kind! You've cost me too much already, Cooper! It's time to pay the fiddler. [prepare to finish Sly off but is stopped by Bentley]
Bentley: That's enough, Penelope!
Penelope: Huh? [sees Bentley in a mech made from the remains of the Moat Monster]
Bentley: You heard me.
Penelope: Bentley, you're suit. Is that my... my Moat Monster?
Bentley: Yeah, what's left of it anyway. The design was... adequate. I made some adjustments.
Penelope: Hmph! It was just a prototype anyway!
Bentley: Why'd you do it, Penelope? You owe me that much at least.
Penelope: Why? For you, of course! I had to make you see how things could be!
Bentley: I'm not going to be one of the bad guys, Penelope!
Penelope: Ha! "Bad Guys"!? That's kinda funny, Bentley, seeing how as how you work for a thief. [motions to the still trapped Sly] But you know the most valuable thing Sly ever stole? Your potential! Together we could change the world, but you're still chasing after honor for chump change! When are you gonna wake up?
Bentley: So you sold out to Le Paradox for the money?!
Penelope: [face palms] No, you're not listening! He's just a means to an end.
Bentley: Wow, and I thought you were smart. Do you really think he's going to let you go? He owns you now. [Penelope rolls her eyes] You're his puppet... and when you've serve your purpose, he's going to cut your strings.
Penelope: I'm nobody's puppet! Too bad I can't say the same for you. I'm sorry, Bentley, but I guess it's time to make this breakup official!
Bentley: Penelope, wait! We don't have to do it like this!
Penelope: Oh, I think we do. It's time to cut some strings... for good. [she and Bentley fight]
Sly Cooper (narrating): We contacted Dimitri, who started in about Sandstorms and Camel Spit. Well, we finally deciphered enough to realize it was my ancestor Salim al-Kupar who was in trouble now. Which meant, we needed to get to Ancient Arabia on the double. This time Carmelita provided a solution. Before Le Paradox grabbed her back in the museum, she'd manage to pocket a gold coin as evidence. And our luck held as it turned out the antique gold piece was exactly what we needed.
Sly Cooper (narrating): As we prepared to leave, everyone was keeping an eye on Bentley. He downplayed his heroics and refused to acknowledge that he'd saved us all. I sensed a new confidence in Bentley, which I guess had come from finally confronting his personal demons. We've been through so much. But when it really mattered, we bounce back stronger than ever. I was sure about two things, I couldn't be more proud of Bentley, and we were gonna need every ounce of his newfound strength to take down Le Paradox.
Episode 5: 40 ThievesEdit
Sly Cooper (narrating): We traveled to Ancient Arabia to find Salim al-Kupar, an ancestor said to possess the stealth of forty thieves. No surprise then when Bentley's research revealed that this guy was a charter member of the infamous forty thieves. For once, it appeared we'd have plenty of backup to help out with this job. When we arrived, however, we were shocked to find that most of the thieves had already retired. Having made their fortunes and gotten older, these great thieves have decided to call quits, and enjoyed their golden years in peace. What wasn't shocking was the unmistakable presence of Cyrille Le Paradox. Nasty-looking guards patrolled everywhere, and it was clear that something sinister was going on. After some detective work, Bentley had even worse news - no one had seen Salim al-Kupar for some time. He had been working with the few of the remaining thieves but had simply vanished. So where was he? That was the first thing we needed to figure out.
Lost and FoundEdit
Bentley (binocucom): Okay, Sly. Word on the street is that Salim Al-Kupar was driven into hiding, but that he's still in the area. We need to figure out where he's hiding and then find out why. To facilitate that, I've built you a new toy.
Sly Cooper: Cool! Is it a robotic turtle butler?
Bentley (binocucom): No, after gathering data from your ancestors, I've been able to map the Cooper DNA! I've modified your binocucom with a new visual guidance system that I've programmed to detect anything with which Salim Al-Kupar may have come in contact.
Sly Cooper: Wow, Bentley! That's some real science fiction!
Sly Cooper (narrating): Back at the hideout, introductions went quickly as Salim stuffed his face. He told us about his problem. Some new player calling herself Miss Decibel had rolled into town and started throwing lots of money around. It didn't take a genius to figure out who the time traveling lieutenant was here. Salim and the three remaining thieves had decided to pull one last heist before disappearing into retirement, Miss Decibel being the target. Of course, with her technology, she had easily captured his thief brothers, and Salim had been trying to come up with a plan to free them ever since.
Sly Cooper (narrating): Bentley uncovered some interesting background information. Miss Decibel had come from a wealthy British family. Her true love was classical music. Unfortunately, her complete lack of musical talent, coupled with an extreme temper, made for a volatile combination. After suffering a freak accident during a tantrum, she was left unable to play music... normally. However, when she discovered she can control people with her hypnotic tones, a new criminal was born. She began using her devious tones to control others, forcing them to commit crimes for her. We told Salim about Le Paradox, and the whole thing made some strange kind of sense to him. The bad news was he wasn't completely convinced that we were there to help him. I could see I was going to have to prove myself... again.
Up in SmokeEdit
Heavy Metal MeltdownEdit
All Rolled UpEdit
Sly Cooper: And must you always stay downwind.
Hold... That... Blimp!Edit
Sly Cooper (narrating): We may have stopped Miss Decibel, but it meant absolutely nothing. We were on the ropes. Le Paradox had beaten us every step of the way and he held all the cards. Carmelita, my ancestors' canes, and now his fake pedigree. I couldn't remember a time since we've teamed up that we felt so defeated. And talking to Dimitri didn't help. He was freaked out and yelling about having to "Boogie down in Skunktown". So as usual, his words made little sense. But the message was clear: we had to get back home fast. We may have been down, but we definitely weren't out. There was too much writing on this: The lives of everyone we care about, not to mention the very future of our existence. No matter how, we would make things right. So as we roared back through time to Paris, I knew... we were in ...for the fight of our lives.
Sly Cooper (narrating): We've finally made it home to Paris, only to find a place we hardly recognized. It was obvious Le Paradox was in control since his face covered the city like a bad rash. The only positive was that Bentley was able to dig up a lot of dirt, including the fact that Le Paradox was from a family of thieves himself. And then we made a major discovery. I knew that my dad's heist of the World's Largest Diamond had made him a legendary thief, but what I never knew was that Le Paradox's father had planned to steal it first, and frame my dad for the crime! Only, he was a little too slow, and got himself caught instead. With his father gone, Le Paradox had no one to teach him the family business, and after a string of failed jobs, he wound up in prison too. It was here ironically that he finally got his criminal education. After his release, Le Paradox maintained the appearance of a law abiding citizen. In reality, he used his prison contacts to form his own syndicate and began masterminding heists worldwide. These days, he traveled the globe as a billionaire art collector while his real business was the trafficking of priceless stolen treasures. Clearly, he blamed the Coopers for his family's past misfortunes and his plan, was to wipe us out completely. I had to find a way to stop him. But first, I had to rescue Carmelita.
Deja Vu All Over Again!Edit
Bentley Chalk Talk
Bentley: Alright, we all know this is our last shot at busting Le Paradox and rescuing Carmelita. Currently, his blimp is docked outside the museum. I can't pinpoint Carmelita's exact position, but I believe she's being held somewhere near the loading bay. Sly, there appears to be a utility hatch on the blimp's underside that will get you inside. You can use one of the mooring lines to reach him. Once you're in, try to gather as much information as you can. But remember, we'll be right behind you. So don't do anything rash. Murray, I need you to get the van ready. We're gonna need backup on this one. So first, you and I are going on a little recruiting trip. Then we'll rendezvous with Sly inside the blimp and figure out our next move. Okay, I realize it's not the most elaborate plan, but it's the best we've got. So everybody watch your backs and let's go take that skunk down once and for all!
Cyrille Le Paradox: The deal?! The deal is you Coopers! You destroyed my father and you almost got me! But not quite. And when I rebuilt myself, I swore I would erase the Cooper name from history completely! And so today, my revenge will be complete!
Where is Sly?Edit
Bentley (narrating): It's been a while since that night, but there was still no sign of Sly or that cursed blimp. The skunk could barely tread water. So by the time they picked him up, he was happy to see them. Word is, he earned a special cell in solitary confinement where the only thing he'll be collecting from now on is grey hair.
Bentley (narrating): Both Paris and the Thievius Raccoonus were back to normal, but that hardly made us feel any better. At first, we just waited assuming Sly would show up the way he always did. But as the days stretched into weeks, we had to face the fact that he was truly lost. We've stopped talking about it all the time, but I know it's all we're thinking about. Even if we show it in different ways. Murray seems like his usual cheery self, but I can tell there's a new level of seriousness underneath it all. He's on the professional wrestling circuit now and he's really been pushing himself. I know he's doing it to keep his fighting skills sharp. Like all of us, he wants to be ready for action the minute we locate Sly. Carmelita returned to Interpol where she threw herself into her work, busting criminals at a record pace. She's been so busy, I haven't seen her for a while now. My sources tell me, she's conducting her own investigation into Sly's whereabouts. Out of everyone, I think she took his disappearance the hardest. Even if she never shows it. At least not in public.
Bentley (narrating): As for myself, I continue to search. Even using all my technology, I haven't found a clue. The time machine is no help since we need to know where Sly was for that to work. I get discouraged sometimes, but I'll never give up. Because I know Sly's still out there and I know that wherever he is, we will find him.
Bentley (narrating): Rioichi Cooper continued to refine his master ninja techniques as well as his sushi. And while his thefts were never detected, his sushi restaurant was recognized as the finest in Japan.
Bentley (narrating): El Jefe remains behind bars. He was transferred to a South American prison where he now works rolling cigars. Unfortunately for him, there's no smoking allowed.
Bentley (narrating): "Tennessee Kid" Cooper recovered his gold and his place in history as "The Greatest Outlaw of the Old West". His legend grew even bigger when he began stealing from crooked lawmen exclusively.
Bentley (narrating): Toothpick was arrested and became part of a chain gang working on the railroads. He eventually went deaf and faded into obscurity.
Bentley (narrating): Caveman Cooper kept up his physical training and return to his role as egg thief extraordinaire. Perhaps most importantly, he pioneered the use of his cane as a tool for thieving.
Bentley (narrating): The Grizz received a lengthy prison sentence and began a new career as a rap artist. In his spare time, he paints portraits of his fellow inmates.
Bentley (narrating): Sir Galleth Cooper return to his heroic adventures and went on to form the Knights of the Cooper Order, a gallant group that stole from corrupt nobility. He also became a successful, if overly dramatic, actor.
Bentley (narrating): Penelope was sent to Europe's highest security prison where she promptly escaped. She remains at large and the police have no clue as to her whereabouts. Recently however, I've been receiving some mysterious postcards.
Bentley (narrating): Salim al-Kupar finally retired from thieving and took a long nap. Then he dreamed of a lucrative new business. Parking his camel around town, he sold snacks to hungry customers. It was highly successful.
Bentley (narrating): After being locked, up Miss Decibel decided to make some changes. She had the horn removed from her trunk, enrolled in anger-management classes, and began teaching music to other prisoners. With continued good behavior she might get an early parole.
Bentley (narrating): Dimitri returned to his globe-trotting ways as a celebrity scuba diver. And even launched a new line of fashion wear. He's so successful, there's a new reality TV Show chronicling his adventures. It's called Disco Diver.
Bentley (narrating): Le Paradox had all his assets seized, including his art collection. And everything was donated to the city of Paris. I'm told his cell was modified to be completely Odor-Proof. I suppose that's good for the guards, since he's going to be living there for a very long time.
(When Sly approaches a large container.)
Bentley (binocucom): You can probably move that container if you hit it hard enough, Sly.
- Oh, you're runnin' like a little coward?
- Now where'd you get off to?
- Woolly Mammoths
- Mech wolves
- What was that?